If you're ever lost for words at a party, linguist John McWhorter suggests two lines guaranteed to move any conversation forward. The first, said with interest, sarcasm, exasperation or pretty much any other emotion: "But where do you draw the line?" The second, with a slight, cut-off laugh: "I'll bet!"

His lectures on "The Story of Human Language" have been keeping my iPod warm and making me think about the meaning hidden in common wine words.

The language of wine, like that of ballet, tends to be French. If you don't speak it, you'll flounder forever, a perpetual amateur. But take heart: In European languages, amateur (literally lover) is more akin to connoisseur (literally knower), someone who puts in time and effort and knows his stuff.

As amateurs know, ground zero of the wine matrix is Bordeaux, and its name explains why. Eau means water; bord means edge, as in border. Sitting "au bord d'eau" on the banks of the Gironde River, close by the Atlantic, made Bordeaux a crucial trading port for commodities like wine and slaves.

Where the Gironde splits in two is a triangle of land called Entre Deux Mers (between two seas), whose wines are much cheaper than they are up north in the Medoc, once home to the Medulli, an ancient Celtic tribe.

Now it's home to great chateaux, many of which hyphenate family name and property feature. The Rothschild family's Lafite comes from the Gascon term "la hite," or small hill. Their other property name, Mouton, means sheep.

Chateau Ducru-Beaucaillou celebrates a stream and its beau caillou, or beautiful pebbles, while Latour refers to a small stone tower on the estate. Chateau Beychevelle is the sound-morph of an oft-heard command by passing sailors to "Basse voile!" or lower the sails.

Chateaux Petrus gets its name from the Greek root for rock - all around if you stop to notice it - as in petrified (hard as rock) and petrochemicals. And though the name Peter has lost its minerality, the French cognate, Pierre, is still French for stone.

Red Bordeaux is known in the UK as claret, odd for wine that tends to be more inky than clear. But actually, until the 18th century the finest Bordeaux was more like a dry rose, elegant and clear and so dubbed clairet.

Bordeaux's main grapes, cabernet sauvignon (red) and sauvignon blanc (white), share savage roots: sauvignon comes from sauvage, or wild. Merle is a name for a variety of thrushes, and local dialect for a young blackbird was merlot. It's not clear if the wine shares the bird's beautiful color or was merely its favorite snack.

Moving to Burgundy, the best real estate is the Côte d'Or (say "coat door"), or hillside of gold. This refers to either (a) autumn colors, (b) profitability or (c) eastern-facing slopes, shortened from the original Côte d'Orient. Whichever you pick, they all point to the importance of sun exposure in this cool region.

Burgundy grapes are chardonnay (a much morphed word originally meaning something like "where the thistles grow") and pinot noir, the darkest of a large family named for the pine cones their tightly wound grape clusters resemble.

Many famous Burgundian vineyards have humble origins: Montrachet derives from mont rachat, or bald mountain, and Chambertin once was cultivated by a peasant named Bertin - it was his champs, or field. Italy's Campania region comes from the same root, as does Champagne. This explains why "Fine Champagne Cognac" has nothing to do with bubbles, but just tells you the grapes come from open fields, not crummier wooded ones.

Germany's Rhein and France's Rhone rivers both have Proto-Indo- European roots, but the former comes from reie, or flow, the latter from ret, or roll, which is also why wheels rotate. A rotisserie rotates, but it also roasts, just like the Rhone region Côte Rôtie or roasted slope, a barren, rocky hillside blasted with sunshine.

I'll leave Croze Hermitage, Châteauneuf-du-Pape and the rest of Europe for another day, but while you wait, consider visiting the Languedoc. In the local Occitan language, oui becomes oc, and any region called the Language of Yes has to be a friendly place.

jester@corkjester.com

Recommended:

White

* Trivento Select Mendoza Torrontes 2007 (Argentina) $11

* Nine Vines Angneis Viognier 2006 (Australia) $12

* Ceago Chardonnay Mendocino 2005 (U.S.) $18

* Merry Edwards Russian River Valley Sauvignon Blanc 2006 (U.S.) $27

Red

* Veramonte Pinot Noir Reserve Casablanca 2006 (Chile) $15

* Morgan Twelve Clones Pinot Noir 2006 (U.S.) $31

* Iron Horse Pinot Noir 2005 (U.S.) $35