Jeanne Assam, a veteran police officer from Minnesota, was a 41-year-old newcomer to New Life Church and one of its armed, plainclothes security guards when Matthew Murray opened fire inside the church.

As the crowd fled in panic, she brought down Murray with a bullet. He then committed suicide.

Hailed as a hero, the self-effacing Assam became disillusioned when the media began delving into her private life. Today, she still belongs to New Life Church and is part of the security team. She also will take part in a news conference Sunday at the church. She agreed to answer questions via e-mail for the Rocky. Some responses have been shortened for space.

What has your life been like this year?

It's not been easy at all. It's been very, very challenging, but in a good way. I would say it's been like a hard-core boot camp where the Lord has taught me so much in a very short amount of time. He has taught me to love those who hate me and those who would love to see me fail. I have also met some incredibly kind, wonderful people, and I have discovered that there are those out there who dislike me when I have never even met them. That's OK, though. I care about people despite their shortcomings. None of us is or ever will be perfect.

What's been the best part?

I would say, getting to meet President Bush, receiving the Medal of Distinction from the Colorado Springs Police Department, having resolutions in my honor from the House and Senate. Things like that. I am always amazed at how much people go out of their way to show their appreciation for someone. I am not a celebrity or well-known politician, I am just me.

The worst part?

Life is one test after another . . . the amazing part is that I had the incredible opportunity (during the shooting and its aftermath) to feel God's powerful presence as He shielded me from harm.

Any big changes in jobs, new dreams?

I have been a police officer for 15 years. I don't really want to do anything else unless it would help those who are hurting in a much bigger way . . . I'd like to get my book published, and I'd love to work for the Colorado Springs Police Department.

You quipped that maybe the media uproar would help you find that special guy. Did it happen?

I will meet someone special when I'm supposed to. What's the rush? My life is good.

What has it been like living in the limelight?

People have been incredibly respectful. I sometimes see people looking at me, but it could very well be that I have ketchup on my face. I don't worry about it. I have good days and I have bad days. I know some have seen me when I have been discouraged and don't have a smile on my face, but that has got to be OK. I'm just a human like everyone else. I hurt and I laugh. Sometimes at the same time. I love my friends, my family, and my church, because they just let me be me.