Seven years.

That's 2,555 days. That's 61,320 hours.

And $61,320 was the exact amount of the progressive win on the Monopoly machine Mrs. Buzz was raking over the coals. The weekend hadn't quite gone according to plan so far, but I just knew that this mere penny slot machine was poised to eliminate our student loans, second mortgage and credit-card bills and leave plenty left over in one fell swoop. I mean, it had to be more than mere coincidence - here we were, spending our seventh anniversary in Black Hawk.

That's the problem with gambling. It's all broken promises.

We got up to the Isle on Friday afternoon and checked in around 4. They had our Jacuzzi suite ready and waiting. The room was exactly what we'd hoped for, with a king-size bed and a giant jacuzzi. There wasn't really a balcony to speak of, but the French doors opened for a view of the mountainside - the top of which was obscured by low-hanging clouds lazily rolling in.

Two hours and a soak later, we lit out for the Chart House in Genesee for our quiet, romantic dinner. We never got there. The highway was blocked by boulders. We turned around and headed back to the Isle for dinner at Faraday's, a bit noisier and with none of the view the Chart House offers.

The casino floor at the Isle is long and bustling on a Friday night. I tried my hand at a blackjack table and promptly lost four hands in a row. Mrs. Buzz didn't fare much better at the slots.

Slots hate me, though. I think they sense my overall disdain for their thuggish tactics and smug duplicity. It's not like the tables, where you actually have to engage with people and think about your move. There's a sense of controlled destiny at the tables; at least when I lose there, I lose on my terms. I busted. I didn't take the hit. I doubled down.

Even with video poker, it still feels like everything's up to the machine. Your destiny sits squarely in her one arm. Her beeps and whistles and lights and sirens are just fake eyelashes, implants and a wig on an ugly, grimacing thief.

On the plus side, drinks are still pretty much free when you're playing, so I bellied up to the round bar in the center of the room, above which a country band played. The bartenders whipped me up a proper tropical drink - that is to say, they poured me a slushy frozen piña colada with a governed shot of rum kicked out by a gun, topped with whipped cream and a cherry. There I sat, playing a quarter at a time on a video poker machine, cursing her smiling faade and nursing a drink that looked as if a 6-year-old should be drinking it. And it was quite tasty.

But that was last night, and this morning things were different. We had breakfast at the Lodge Casino buffet and wandered down onto the empty casino floor while the snow started to pick up outside. This Monopoly game was treating Mrs. Buzz like a lady: She was up $60 (after dropping in $10), and the stars were aligning. The big payout was just . . . about . . . to . . . Wait. What happened?

The game froze. The progressive payout amount went blank. The technician showed up a moment later.

"Sorry. This one's out of order."

So much for lucky number 7.

Isle of Capri

401 Main St., Black Hawk 800-THE-ISLE

• Use the valet parking. It's complimentary, and they'll deliver your car to one of three pickup points in the Isle and Colorado Station casinos.

• Jacuzzi Suites are fun and $169/ night on weekends.

• Hop over to the Lodge Casino for the breakfast buffet if you stay overnight. Well worth the $6.99.