Jacob Ind's crime had all the hallmarks of a cold-blooded execution.

The 15-year-old wanted his parents dead and arranged to have a friend kill them in their Woodland Park home.

But after the couple survived being shot and stabbed while in their beds, Ind took matters into his own hands.

Unnerved by his mother's anguished screams, Ind aimed a gun at his stepfather's head and pulled the trigger. He missed but fired again.

Then he shot his wailing mother.

The teen spent the night with his parents' bodies and went to school the next day, taking a math test before he was questioned about the murders.

Ind has been condemned to life behind bars without the possibility of parole for the Dec. 17, 1992, deaths of his mother and stepfather, Pamela and Kermode Jordan.

His accomplice, Gabrial Adams, is also serving a life prison sentence.

But even the judge who sentenced Ind said the teen was the product of a troubled upbringing.

"Whatever else we can say here, there really was a lack of mutual love, mutual respect and mutual compassion in your family," said El Paso County District Judge Mary Jane Looney."That seems really tragic because I think that left you in many ways almost a hollow person. I wish that could have been changed. Had you had a different kind of life, perhaps we wouldn't be here."

Ind's defense attorneys argued there was more than a lack of love and compassion in Ind's home.

They alleged that Ind arranged the killing to end years of sexual, physical and emotional abuse by both parents.

During the five-week trial, the teen's defense team put on a case against Ind's parents - a case based largely on testimony from Ind's older brother, who said he moved out because of abuse.

Charles Ind, who changed his name after the trial, told jurors that he and Jacob were subjected to sexual abuse and frequent beatings as young boys after their mother married Kermode in 1978.

He gave detailed accounts of being tied to a toilet during sexual encounters with their stepfather and being beaten and whipped with weapons called "Billy Belt" and "Mr. Stick."

Neither Ind nor his brother told anyone about the sexual abuse until just before Ind went on trial. Jacob Ind didn't testify in his defense.

The defense also included testimony from Ind's maternal grandmother and a family friend, who told jurors they observed suspicious behavior involving Jacob Ind and his stepfather.

Prosecutors disputed the claims of abuse. They argued the so-called physical abuse was merely discipline and that the sexual abuse didn't take place.

At the sentencing hearing, Looney said she was troubled by her lack of options. Colorado law mandates life without parole for first-degree murder.

"I'm not saying that a long sentence, including a life sentence, is not appropriate for murder," she said. "I think it is."

But, Looney said, she believed a teenage defendant such as Ind should have some hope of parole.

"It seems to me that kind of change might be an appropriate change in the statute in many cases that I've seen - certainly this case."

Now 27, Jacob Ind has been in prison for 11 years.

"For a long time I couldn't acknowledge the gravity of what I did," he said.

"I was thinking, 'Well, I killed two child molesters. What do I care?' As I've gotten older and matured, I've realized the pain I've caused my family and my friends, everyone who knew me. It bothers me a lot, the pain I've caused."

Ind said he is still angry with his parents.

Among other things, he said, they poisoned him against his natural father, who has supported him throughout the trial and his imprisonment.

"When you're a kid and trying desperately to earn the love of your mom and she's completely demonizing this guy, you're going to demonize him, too, just to try to earn that little bit of respect or love you can get," Ind said.

A bright student, Ind said he idolized pothead comic Tommy Chong but had planned to go to college and become a quantum physicist.

His goal at home, however, was simple: "I just wanted to live to the next day. I was just living in a state of dread and terror. Every day I didn't kill myself was a good day.

"Getting beat, degraded, insulted and humiliated time and time again, that just destroys you as a person."

When he was first arrested, Ind said jail gave him a sense of family he never had with his parents.

"I spent Christmas in the juvenile system, and it was actually one of my best Christmases I ever had," he said.

But that ended once he was transferred to prison.

The worst part, he said, is "having to be around all the inmates. That's the punishment. Most of them are losers. They aspire to nothing better. All the normal stages of growth that a person goes through, I've done in this crazy environment."

At first, Ind said he fought and emulated experienced inmates. "I used to look up to them. I thought, 'I want to be a convict just like them.' "

As a result, Ind spent eight years in 23-hour lockdown. It was there, he said, that he finally decided to work on changing his outlook - and the direction of his life.

"It gave me quiet time away from everyone else so I could focus on my own issues. I was able to do a lot of self-reflection," he said.

"I decided I didn't want to be like these other people that I see around here. I'm going to follow my own path."

At the Colorado State Penitentiary, Ind said, he began taking medications for a borderline personality disorder, depression and self-mutilation.

But Ind said he's received little therapy behind bars.

"The main concern here is that I don't kill myself or kill someone else," as opposed to rehabilitation, he said.

Like many of Colorado's young lifers, Ind believes his sentence is too long.

He said he should have been sent to a mental institution for "zero to life to get this kid's head on straight and release him when he's no longer a threat."

His path to turn himself around involves lots of study and reading history, politics and religion.

His favorite book is The Clash of Civilizations and The Remaking of World Order. He works in the power sewing unit at the prison.

"I'm basically an 8-year-old Asian girl slaving away, except she probably gets paid more than I do," he joked.

Ind considers himself a Christian now, but says he was raised as a "Bolshevik" by his stepfather and mother.

"I was raised diehard communist, atheist and to hate all forms of religion as silly superstitions," he said.

But after he killed his parents, he said, he prayed.

Over time, he has come to understand that he had options other than murder.

Abused teens need to "get the strength to leave," Ind said.

"That's the hard part. Most of them have been battered down so much they don't have the strength to tell, let alone to leave."

Ind said he and his brother told teachers and social workers only the most basic details about their home life, hoping they'd get help.

But help never came.

Ind said teachers, friends and authorities need to recognize that a small complaint may signify a deep underlying problem.

"Kids do their little cries for help the best they can," he said.

"From their point of view, they're taking great giant leaps by putting those little red flags out. But people don't understand, and it falls on deaf ears because they expect the kids to just gush out everything. From the kids' perspective, they're yelling, 'Hey! Help!' but to everyone else it's just like, 'Peep, peep,' no big deal."

Ind believes his advice would fall on deaf ears if he tried to counsel teenagers.

"Geez, teenagers are so hard-headed I don't know if there's anything I could say without just putting them through this drudgery in here," he said.

"To be in prison is probably the most pathetic life you could ever have, and they should avoid it at all costs. This is definitely a life to nowhere."

The issue

One in eight lifers in Colorado - 46 out of 360 - were sentenced for murders committed when they were younger than 18.

In the wake of a U.S. Supreme Court ruling that ends the death penalty for juveniles, a national debate is emerging over laws such as Colorado's that require life without parole for teens convicted as adults of first-degree murder.

-- Those who want to change the law say: New research shows juveniles' brains are not fully developed so their faulty judgment makes them less responsible for crimes than adults. Juveniles could be rehabilitated and should get a chance at parole.

-- Those who oppose changing the law say:

Inmates serving life without parole took others' lives and have forfeited their right to freedom.

The young killers, if released, would pose too great a risk to society.

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